How GM CEO Mary Barra, IBM former CEO Ginny Rometty learned to be women leaders

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GM CEO Mary Barra and former IBM CEO Ginny Rometty have a lot in common, from overcoming early obstacles in childhood to rising through the corporate ranks to become CEOs of blue-chip, century-old companies. They are professional peers, and friends, and were brought together for the inaugural CNBC CEO Council: Leaders' Library, as a result of Barra's recommendation of Rometty's book, "Good Power." The wide-ranging conversation held on Monday in New York City with CNBC's Leslie Picker covered how Barra and Rometty embody power in the workplace, leading companies through transformations, and bridging economic and social divides in the U.S. In addition, the business icons discussed how their own view of being a "woman" leader has changed over the course of their careers. Often being the only women in the room in manufacturing and technology engineering roles at major corporations led them to shy away from gender as they climbed the corporate ladder. But now, as women at the top of their respective fields, Barra and Rometty's thinking on the topic of female leadership has evolved. Here are a few highlights from the conversation. Overcome your hesitation to lead with 'woman' It may seem logical that with so few women in high-profile CEO roles — even today it is only about 10% of the Fortune 500 and S&P 500 — female CEOs might be inclined to highlight gender as part of their success, but both Barra and Rometty say they shied away from leading with gender early in their careers — or even mentioning it. They now they say that was a mistake. They believe leading with "woman" is critical to showing the way forward for the next generation of leaders in a world where the gender disparity in the C-suite remains wide. Rometty said she began embracing her identity as a woman and mother in the workplace when people began recognizing her as a role model. "People can't be what they can't see. And I finally realized that I was being selfish by saying, 'no, no, don't look at me for being a woman, don't ever look at me for this.' Then I finally started to embrace it. ... I talk about our differences, that we can leave a memory and a mark," Rometty said. "It's worth noticing that you notice there's not many of them." Barra ultimately had a similar awakening. She rose from the ground floor in manufacturing, and said in early roles it was easy for her to overlook being the only woman. But as she climbed to the C-suite, comments on her identity increased, a situation that made her uncomfortable. Barra recalled asking people, "Can we talk about something else, because I'd like to think I got here because of my skills and abilities and contributions, not just that I'm a female." Barra changed her perspective as she witnessed the impact her identity had on other women in the workplace. "When I got the CEO job, people would come up to me, and they'd say, 'So you're the first female CEO of an auto company?' ... But then I had the same situation [as Rometty], when someone came up to me after a meeting or something and said, 'you know, my daughter is now working hard at math and science in middle school, because she wants to be like you.' And then I'm like, okay, I get it. I get it."